Y-M-C-A!

So I signed up at the local Y. You might ask, doesn't Ft. SINYF have something like nine gyms? Why on earth would you pay money for another one? I would tell you- because the PRT is coming up. And sometimes I don't feel like driving all the way back to Ft. SINYF just to PT. Speaking of which, I have set myself the laudable-but-we'll-see-how-it-goes goal of going to the gym every single day until the PRT. I already know it's not going to happen over the long weekend. If I'm especially good, I might get up early on Friday morning, but they'll probably be closed anyway so it doesn't really matter too much.
Also talked to the parental units today about upcoming trip. They're disappointed it won't be for longer, of course. I tried to explain, but it wasn't good. I understand that they love me, we just can't be around each other for any length of time.
Maybe some day I'll be able to tell myself that it just doesn't matter any more, that holding on for any longer to a bad memory of the past is only going to hurt myself more.
But I can't stand it when people who know me and say they love me can think the worst of me with no remorse and no memory of doing so.

Here a chief, there a chief, everywhere a chief-chief...

Ack. So I feel stupid but I think I can blame it on the near-heatstroke.
Today I had to do lots of stuff at the annoying place. Actually I didn't even have that much I had to do, but it took a REALLY long time. I was supposed to get a ride back with some guys instead of having to walk back across base. I got abandoned though. I was pretty pissed too, especially since it took me a while to figure this out because I didn't have my phone on me and couldn't call them to see where the hell they were. So after waiting about twenty minutes, I gave up and hiked back across base. Ft. SINYF is not like Sunny Point. Sunny Point was built on a fairly impressive hill but everything isn't that far away- it's just UP. On Ft. SINYF, everything is far apart. I feel for the Army newbs. Their life must really suck...
Anyway, I managed to get across base without dying of heatstroke only to present a copy of my Very Important Chit to the wrong Chief...
I should have realised there was something wrong when I saw that he was a chief not a senior chief. And I should have realized I was in the wrong building. Should have. Didn't. I blame the heatstroke. After profuse apologies, I made my escape. I really hope that chief doesn't remember I was also the idiot who turned up at oh-dark-thirty, hella early for a weigh in... I guess none of it is a very big deal. I mean, I wasted less than a minute of his time.
It's just I hate feeling stupid. I hate not knowing who I'm supposed to talk to or why.
I'd like to add in my own defence here that I was told to give this VIC to this senior RIGHT AFTER the run at morning PT. In my humble opinion, I think I did good remembering anything at all. It's usually all a blur until I get some water and walk around for a bit. Oh- I found a way to beat the morning run blues too! If it's at-your-own-pace, skip the five minute break and just start rolling. It's very psychologically satisfying to not be the dead-last person sometimes, and to not hold up the works. And to think for a few dizzy seconds that you managed to run the whole damn two miles and change in 16.__. In reality it was like 21 something. But that's not bad. And I got further without stopping this time than I did last time. Got all the way to the second corner! My goal for Saturday morning or Sunday evening is to the Fitness center!

Well, now I feel silly...

It was good to get that rant out of my system yesterday. I got up this morning and went to PT, to hear the four most beautiful words at a PT session (well, second most beautiful phrase since the first one is 'PT is cancelled') ''At your own pace'. Thank you, God!
So I at-my-own-pace ran the 'little' loop. It took me a while, but greatly to my surprise I was NOT the very last person! Shocker, I tell you! I was second to last, I think. There was an older petty officer back there, somewhere. He never passed me, therefore I was not last, right? I ran and I ran and I ran... I got farther than I did on Monday without stopping, much to my happiness. I was still hella far back, and still providing 'motivation' for the other people near the back. If it looked like I was about to catch up, they took off.
It's weird, really. Despite that rant and the fact that I'm dreading getting up at oh-dark-thirty tomorrow morning too, I don't have the special terror of running that I once did. Maybe it helped that Warrant didn't yell at us today. Somebody in the back was yelling, but it wasn't as frightening.
And then, at the very end, I got some good news. Warrant asked who was planning to bike or elliptical and told us that we would start machine PT on Monday. Thank you, thank you God! Finally! The bad news- and it's not very bad, is that apparently they supervise the bike/elliptical very strictly here so you can't get away with half-assing your pushups or situps. I'm not too worried about that. I'm good with both and I can only improve. And I will improve. Life has taken a dramatic turn for the better with regards to PT. When it comes to other Div. things, still not so much. But I got a lot of useful things done today and will continue to do lots of useful things tomorrow, hopefully. I need to make a list so I don't forget anything important...
And I'm now 4k behind on my AugWriMo...
I'll fix it...

PT! Good for me! Good for you! Aaarggh....

So, I am back on a more strictly regimented PT schedule. I hasten to point out to my dear readership that I WAS going to the gym every single day in the evening and biking or elipticaling my little heart out. Every single blessed day. I was sooo good. And then I joined the Div. And suddenly my time was less my own. I expected that. I did not expect Monday morning to be the most painful run I've had in a long time. Perhaps I should have, especially since I haven't run in a while. But then, I thought why bother?

I bike my PRT. Laugh. Go ahead and get it out of your system. It's hilarious, right? That we're allowed to plop down on a bike and burn calories for 12 minutes in lieu of a run. Well, stuff you. It's a damn good work-out and it's CARDIO which is what matters. Besides, would you say the same thing about swimming? Well, probably. But I'd love to see someone get horribly shown up- 'Oh, swimming's EASY! I don't need to practice, I'll just show up and PRT!" Hehe.. You die by lap eight if you do that...
I on the other hand, can just throw myself into the pool and push out 12 laps in the required time. I've done it. I don't recommend it, and I know I could have done better if I remembered racing turns, but that's neither here nor now.

The main thing right now is this- in less than 10 weeks, I'm supposed to do my real twice-a-year PRT. Does it make ANY sense to not practice how you're going to play? No. Not really. Is there any earthly reason why I shouldn't be doing machine PT instead of this running crap? Again, no. The only thing I've heard said for running is that it builds division cohesiveness. I fail to see how that works. Yep, everyone cheers for me when I 'do my best' and drag my dying body over the line in one last, all-or-nothing sprint, but there's less cheering in the first half-mile where I'm stumbling and kicking the person behind me.... Because the slow people run up front. I hate it, I hate it, and it's not helping me.

They might say "You'll slack off." Like hell. Honestly? I have my crows. That's supposed to mean something, I thought. Means that I can handle a little extra responsibility and can be trusted not to completely screw up if left unsupervised. At least that's what I thought it meant.

Anyway. Tomorrow at oh-dark-thirty, I will probably be running. If you think of it, say a prayer.

Oh yeah, one more thing- if you want to say something clever like 'You can bike in your own time' the answer is 'No I can't. My body is all-over-agony from yesterday's PT...'